Almost Parent-ish

It’s like having a baby.

I’ve always ignored this because I thought it was really irrelevant. I grew up with pets such as goldfish, hamsters and my mom surprised me with a bunny once, but that was quickly returned. I never had a four-legged living creature that I had to entertain, walk, feed with treats and clean, and make sure they’re “socialized and friendly” - in other words, a dog...

The dog you've seen on my social media is #notmydog. There is a long-winded story to why she was under my care. The thing is, I felt like this was a pregnancy that was kind of expected, but really unexpected. Like I kind of knew what I signed up for, but at the same time I couldn’t predict the outcome.

My life took a major shift and I wasn't ready for it. There were major resistance on both sides - the dog and I. I was immediately overwhelmed. Cue in "Expect What You're Expecting" books....

With mannerisms that I didn't foster at the dog's young age and dealing with embedded habits, it was challenging to make it all work. Excuses such as, "she doesn't know better" or "she's bored" were phrases I was tired of hearing. Why was she being disruptive? 

The thing about becoming a fur parent is that - the idea of having a pet is very nice and attractive. There is this furry thing you can play with and go to places with. But when you face the reality, it is not a breeze walk in the damn park. Nope. Pun intended.

I was not prepared to have my things being chewed on - and yes, they were tucked away in places I thought were unreachable. My alarms were set earlier - like 30-minutes because I have to walk this thing and play fetch before I leave her ten hours unattended. While at work, I am thinking what is she up to? I hope she’s not chewing on my shoes or my books. When the clock strikes 6pm, I’m dashing from Midtown as if I am going to turn into a pumpkin like Cinderella, so she can get her walk in and some playtime.

 I was in this constant anxiety state.

Through this entire experience, I learned something about myself during this undertaking - I am not ready to give up my freedom quite yet.

When the day comes for me to become a fur parent, it would be on my own terms, with my dog. when I am stable in life. So yeah, not right now does not mean not ever. 

Who knows...what if I don't become a dog-mom. What if I am meant to be a cat lady after all? Hrmmm....


Written by Chary