Together & Alone

New York is full of transplants trying to create success in their professional fields or simply just trying to make a change in their lifestyles. It’s truly a difficult place to accomplish those things without feeling distressed or beat down. Isn't that why they call it the Concrete Jungle? But no one told me that it was even harder to make a solid friendship, ESPECIALLY when you are not single.

Four years ago, my boyfriend and I moved to this city with little to no contacts. In efforts to build relationships like the ones back home, he joined a hockey team and I joined a gym. In a matter of days, he was going to the bar with new buddies as I sat at home watching reruns of One Tree Hill.

“You can come along if you want” was our typical weekend conversation. The intention was sweet, but I’ve NEVER been that girl who follows her boyfriend around. We both work well off of independence.

The gym was a blessing and a curse for me. I joined for “social” reasons and wound up losing about 15lbs instead. Although I was also lucky enough to meet some ladies, going out to the club with a group of single girls often ended in disaster. As they danced and flirted with guys, I was left at the bar to fight off weirdos on my own. I am all for doing your thing, but this scene was just not my cup of tea.

As the years past, we made “coupled friends”. Dinners, dancing, drinks and shows with my boyfriend and our coupled friends always end up to be amazing times. Some of my greatest memories have been a result of those nights out.

But there is still something missing. We often discuss living separately to better our social lives, but in reality, he is my BEST friend and I do not want to jeopardize that. 

Isn't there some sort of middle ground?

Ladies, if you are feeling a similar way, let's cnnekt !



Written by Emily